“CROSS my heart and hope to die before I give a poor witness of You!”
“Oh my God… Let me speak only Your Words. Guide my thoughts by Your wisdom and discernment. Fill my heart with Your love, that I may ‘proclaim’ Your good nature. Equip me with Your armor that I may ‘stand’ with You in battle. Today, the enemy has cause to fear. The battle will be great, but the victory, as always Lord, is Yours.”
At my place in the congregation, at the church I first loved and now fight for, a prayer was answered. Those who were there would say… “Yes, she was blind but now she sees.” This is true… But the prayer of which I speak, is one they do not know.
“Oh my God, it has been awhile since I have prayed this. I am sorry! This was the cry from my heart that had brought me this far with You, and yet I had forgotten my way. “The more I seek You, the more I find You. The more I find You, the more I love You.” But my Lord, PLEASE… I don’t care if it kills me, I need to see You; all of YOU!” “And please dear God, not just for me, but for all who stand with me. Let Your presence be so undeniable in this place that we leave changed forever! Let our lamps be full as we wait and our gifts be opened wisely and with value to Your kingdom. We are here for such a time as this… Today is the day of the Lord! Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord God Almighty; Who was, and is, and is coming… soon.”
What I saw from here… was AMAZING! [Don’t get me wrong. I did see good, bad and ugly this day. The enemy does not rest when Jesus worshippers are around; he wants the attention.] I do not credit the church service, the worship, the people, or the message. It had to be about Jesus. HE is the God of restoration! HE is the God of healing! HE is GOD! Jesus tells me “It’s not about you. It’s about Me. I Am Grace!” And for today, He sang… “Forever I Love you. Forever you’ll stand… with Me.” Praise God! It was Jesus who invites; sings; saves; and delivers… Grace.
My God delivered to me exactly what I asked for and more… bright, clearly defined, and breathtakingly beautiful… more majestic, than I had ever seen before. I will spend the rest of my life getting back to that vision of seeing my JESUS… face to face, standing before Him. Emotion overwhelms me as I remember it.
I so wanted to share this, but I knew… NOT. “Cross my heart and hope to die… before I give a poor witness of You Lord.” If you were at SBC, you know I did stand and give a testimony of my clear vision, having been so afflicted for over a year. But this on the heels of a door the Lord said He would open for entry. HIS will, not mine. There is saying too much and then there is missed opportunity to ‘Say what you need to say’… for Him. Both are poorly witnessed.
“Cross my heart and hope to die… ” How can I stand among those who I have not seen for some time? They do not know where I have been; Who I’ve looked and run to, Who I’ve journeyed with and prayed to; or Who I’ve served. Lord, they do not know about us and where we have been together. So how can I stand and proclaim You with credibility, reliability, validity? How can I ‘stand and proclaim’ an eyewitness account, having not given their eyes my living testimony? What good reporter of the Good News would fail to take into account… the true source of the eyes who witness?
For those who stand with me; with hearts that bleed like mine for Him… I have a new prayer; that you will see through the lens of Jesus and ‘sense’ HIS acuity. I pray that those who suffer a false witness, that eyes, ears, and hearts be open to the Lord’s healing edit… this very day. It is not about us. It is all about HIM, HIS mercy and grace. Our job is to be open minded; with eyes wide open, with ears to hear, a heart for LOVE, to ‘stand’ and report… as HE highlights the Good News.
Oh my God… A CROSS upon my heart to die, that I may not cause pain from a poor witness of You. Amen.
… an eyewitness account
Do you get the ‘sense’ that this newsflash is for you? READ ALL ABOUT IT!… cover to cover*
[*The Holy Bible*]